Me and my big mouth

I posted this over on wordpress first which should explain why I said a few things that would not make sense here lol.  

Like a dummy I told someone I was going to start posting here so now I have to follow through with it or be a liar.  It might be easier to be known as a liar because then my brain won’t have to work as hard.  Hmmm, that sounds kind of bad, like I can come up with a lie, but not something to post on my blog .

Ok, so here I am like Pooh Bear having to think, think, think.  I’ve already made a video for my penpal this morning, so my brain is out of thoughts.  Hard to believe I used to make two or three posts a day, actual halfway interesting posts that people read and commented on.  That was back in the days of Multiply though, before stupid places like Facebutt became popular.  Now, no matter where you go, there is a “like” button. I hate the “like” button because it makes people too lazy to comment.  And I hate places where “one-liners” suffice as a post for the day.  Or a series of  “one-liner” posts with no depth.  Uh, well, not that my many liner posts have depth these days, but if they did, no one would read them so I resort to nonsense blogs and you can read them or not.

So I was wondering why “they” make it so hard to cancel any service you sign up for?  I had TruGreen treating my lawn for the last five years.  I live in town and we are expected to keep our lawns halfway decent so I got them to start coming out to fertilize, treat for weeds and insects and all that crap. The first three years they sent the same guy out all the time and he had my lawn looking really nice. (I mow my own grass mind you).  Last year, that guy must have left so I had a series of lazy losers coming out and apparently none of them knew what they were doing.  I ended up with lots of bare patches in the back yard, and they totally burnt up the side yard.  I decided to cancel them last year, but when I called they wore me down with promises that they would fix it and do better, so I gave them another chance.   Well the grass was looking great this winter and spring. Nice and green and thick.   A couple of weeks ago, they came out to fertilize it and now it is burnt up UGH!!!  (Insert angry face here).   Monday they came out to “aereate” the lawn which all they really do is poke holes in the yard which the Ibis birds do on a regular basis anyway so there is really no need for this.

Normally when these guys show up, they knock on the door to let me know they are there.  I decided not to answer the door Monday and just watch through the window to make sure they did their job.   So this latest loser does the front yard and left. Never even bothered to go into the back yard.  He thought I wasn’t home so he figured I would not know.  I was livid, but decided to wait a day to cool off before calling.

Yesterday I called them and told them I wanted to cancel the service and not to bother trying to change my mind and not to bother asking all those questions and making offers to “fix” things trying to wear me down. So what does he do?  He proceeds to ask me a series of questions about how they can “fix” things and I kept saying “Just Cancel”  in a firm voice.  But he kept on and on and finally I asked him in a very LOUD firm voice–  “What don’t you understand about JUST CANCEL?”    He starts stuttering and mumbling and making these weird noises and I thought he was either having a heart attack or an orgasm !  Seriously, he was making weird noises and I am thinking “this weirdo is getting turned on by me yelling at him!”  .

He finally tells me to get a pen to write down the cancellation number, but this is after 15 minutes of telling him to just cancel and another five minutes of strange strange sounds on the other end of the phone.

Suffice it to say, I will treat my own lawn from now on. Or maybe I will just let it turn to weeds.  Luckily I don’t live in one of those la-de-da neighborhoods with a Nazi homeowners association.   You can tell that if you could see my next door neighbors yard full of junk .   But better him than having to live by a set of rules made up by someone else who imagines themselves to be Hitler.

Oh, for those who read my other blog on Blogger through the years. Mr. Low T is back from Indiana. I thought the poor guy had up and died.

Have a good day.

Pieces of April

Some of you know that April is not a good month for me. Hasn't been in a long long time. Everything sad happens in April. I won't go into all of that because I have written it all before.  Last year I got through it fine. I'm more accepting of the things life has to offer and the fact that so much of life is beyond our control.  One has to learn to accept the bad and celebrate the good.

Yesterday they took my nephew off of life support.  He has fought a long hard battle most of his life. He was sick when he was born and he has had one problem after another since then, for 30 years. 

They took him off of life support, but he is breathing on his own.  I want to believe that is a good thing, but the damage to his brain may not allow him to function and that is no way to "live".

I sit here on a cloudy, gloomy day, waiting, and trying not to think.

So I fill my mind with odd thoughts.  

I see the bananas I bought just a couple of days ago, turning brown and I think people should not eat bananas unless they live in a place where they can pick them fresh off the tree. 

I look out the front window at the neighbor's house across the street.  She recently had it painted a very subtle grayish tannish color, and it looks good.  But she also got a new front door and a new post for her mailbox.  The front door and the post are painted the same color as each other. A color much different than that house and when I look at it, all I can think about is orange mango shit !!  

I need to get my day going. I have accomplished nothing so far except to pen these few words and down a cup of coffee.

I will leave you with this cliche -   Love your life, you only get one and there are no second chances.


Much love,

Lia~

Deep in the Hundred Acre Wood

Deep in the Hundred Acre Wood...

There were some strange things going on.

We'll start with the Bear , the short fat Bear with a penchant for honey and small pink Piglets. Did you notice that the short fat Bear never wears any pants ?  And why is this short fat Bear with no pants hanging out with a tiny little pink Pig who incidentally never wears pants either ?

And speaking of the tiny little Pig with no pants . I have to wonder what goes on in his world that he always seems to be afraid , even of his own shadow.  I wonder, could his fear have something to do with the short fat yellow Bear with no pants on ?  This short fat yellow Bear, a male bear, who has a distinctively feminine voice?  I call Pig a "he". but I am really not sure if I am referring to Pig by the correct gender. I mean, I am pretty sure Pig is a "he", but he is pink and wears a pink shirt. I'm thinking Pig is just a bit confused.

And what's up with this Tiger, this very bouncy Tiger?  No one can be that happy and bouncy unless they are ingesting something illegal.  Maybe it is just Tiger catnip?  Hmmm, I have my doubts about that.   And have you noticed how this Tiger when he gets all bounced up, he ends up jumping on top of someone and looking into their face as if he wants to gnaw it off??   I read a story about someone doing that in Florida.  That might explain what is going on with this Tiger, who incidentally is also naked. (Kind of like that crazed face eater down in Florida).

What about that Donkey? What's up with him?  Walking around with his head hung low complaining about the world in that melancholy voice of his.  Seems he can only focus on the negative things in life. He is always glum and pessimistic about everything. The only time he perks up is when someone happens to notice him. Actually it only happens when he notices that someone noticed him. Even then, he never smiles. Just lopes along with a forlorn look and attitude.  I guess some Donkeys will never be happy. He should probably talk to that Tiger and see if he could get some of that bouncy stuff he uses.

There are a few other characters who live there in the Hundred Acre Wood.

Two Kangaroos, a Mama and little baby.  They seem the most normal of the lot. But Mama seems to hover over her little boy too much. She is the ultimate helicopter mom, way too overprotective in my opinion.  I assume Mama is a single mom because one never sees hide nor hare of a Daddy around.  Maybe that is why Mama is so sweet and gentle. She wants little Baby to feel safe and secure and content even though she ran Daddy off.  She is trying to prove that Baby does not really need a father figure in his life.  But that is all conjecture. Maybe she is just nice and maybe Daddy is just off on his travels to Australia as a famous boxer kangaroo.   Who knows..

Owl is the most talkative one living in the Hundred Acre Wood.  On the surface he might seem to be quite wise, but he is also quite scatterbrained and he cannot spell. Or perhaps he suffers from a form of dyslexia since he spells his name  Wol.  I mentioned that Owl is quite talkative and he becomes quite cross when interrupted. I guess he is just an old curmudgeon. There is always one in the bunch.

There is Rabbit. Rabbit is quite the obsessive guy and I use the term guy loosely since I have a feeling he might think of himself as born with the wrong parts, or at the very least he needs to come out of the closet along with that bear!

Maybe the reason the Hundred Acre Wood is populated with such strange characters is because of the boy Christopher.  Are they real or a product of his imagination?  Or could it be that poor little Christopher has ingested something himself.  I mean afterall, there is no such thing as a Heffalump or a Woozle.

Or is there?